goals and limits

A recent paper I wrote for a class concerning limiting goals for myself. This was hard for me to write because it really brought back pain that I have been through in my eduactional time. so i hope you enjoy...


In my life, there have been areas where I have limited myself in achieving what I am truly capable of and as I examine my life I see this pattern of thinking which started at a young age. I was raised in a good family that challenged and pushed me to do well in my life. When I started school I was excited and eager to learn. What I learned soon after entering school was the disadvantage that I had because of the color of my skin. Unlike most of the students in my class, who were Asian, I was not given any special attention in my education. When this started happening I began to think of myself than nothing more than an average student.
The elementary school I went to was a hard place to get an education. The school seemed to be set up for students preparing for college. There were programs such as GATE, a special program that helped the very smart kids. When I was in fourth grade my best friend and I were playing on the playground and she was summoned by the teacher for a special test. The test that she was going to be tested for was for the GATE program. I started to walk with her when she turned to me and said, “this is only for the smart kids”. After hearing that, I began to feel that I was not smart and could only do average things. After that test, a majority of my classmates were accepted into this program. Again this continued after I entered junior high school. There was a test that had to be taken to determine what math you were going to enter, I did not score as high as my best friend. As I grew up, I found that my parents were my only support. Yet even with their encouragement, I still only worked half heartedly at it. My parents got me tutoring, extra help, and encouragement to help me in school.
Negative thinking has been so easy for me to fall back into as I am looking to enter into the world of journalism. Sometimes I find myself judging my work as not smart or well written yet I am always encouraged as I allow others to read what I have written. When I am discouraged in my writing I reread some of the works that others have read and remember what they have said. I know my ability to be a journalist in today's world is nothing less then realistic and achievable.